Written by Heather Foley
We live in a world where Instafamous (aka Instagram famous) is a thing. Instagram celebrities get free swag, spokesperson gigs, and all kind of perks. Enough perks that it can get you thinking “how can I get Instagram famous?” Well guys, I totally know how to get Instragram famous, and I’m willing to share my knowledge with you because I’m such a good person. Here are my top ten tips for Instagram fame, you’ll be on the popular page before you know it!
Make your profile public. Yeah this should be a no brainer, obvi you can’t be Instagram famous if no one can creep on your page.
Be a tween girl. Tween competitive cheerleaders and the girls from Dance Moms have an obscene amount of followers, like bordering on icky, and by “bordering on” I mean “totally”. Just watch out for John Mark Karrs.
Workout in your underwear. Make sure you do your deadlifts in your undies and heels, ladies!
Run a fan page. Fan pages are HUGE, so why no start one? You should probably stick to something like One Direction, my Barry Manilow fan page didn’t exactly blow up.
Be inspirational. Slap an inspirational quote under that picture of your boobies hanging out.
#Use #like a #million #Hashtags It’s not annoying at all!
Be a Kardashian and/or Jenner. Self-explanatory.
Work on your selfie game. The ultimate selfie is the perfect combination of cleavage, DSL, and sleepy hooker eyes, practice makes perfect!
Be a French bulldog. If you’re not a Stark and you can’t warg into a French bulldog then buy one, Instagram bitches love French bulldogs.
Just ask for follows. Comment some variation of “please follow me back” on every single picture in your feed. Law of averages you’ll at least pick up a couple followers, right?
You may be saying to yourself, “ah Heather this is all well and good, but homegirl you are not Instagram famous” and you would be right. I am not Instafamous, mostly because I haven’t worked out in my undies and heels since my MySpace days. Personally, I’m ok with being an Instagram nobody, mostly because I saw an episode of Criminal Minds about a serial killer who murdered people with tons of likes. I’m sure no one will murder you though, happy grammin!
PS if you would like to follow me on Instagram you can find me at glamorousbaggage. K thanks bye! Give Caught in Southie a follow too! @CaughtinSouthie – We are running a CIS Instagram Challenge too! You can win prizes galore to some great Southie businesses! Just play! https://caughtinsouthie.com/feature/cis-instagram-challenge