Written by Heather Foley
How’s it going? Christmas is just a couple days away, are you stressed? Yeah, you look it. Seriously, you’re friends probably won’t tell you, but I will, you look like crap. Yes, you. For real, have you slept more than four hours lately? I’m not saying it to be mean. It’s constructive criticism. I only bring it up at all because there’s something you can do about it and it only takes about 20 minutes. Go get a spray tan! Yup, a spray tan. I’m not telling you to drink more water, eat less junk or go to the gym (which you really should be doing, by the way) because it’s just a couple days before Christmas and you need some instant gratification, so walk on up to The Tan Man.
I know for a lot of people the prospect of getting a spray tan can be terrifying. For most of us, taking our clothes off in a cold room in front of a stranger can be one of the scariest things on the planet. (Let’s suspend reality for a couple minutes and pretend I’m one of those people who is scared to take their clothes off – just go with me on this.) You basically get power hosed with cold tanning spray and you spend the next 24 hours worrying that your color will set somewhere between Oompa loompa and Snooki but it doesn’t have to be that way. Well, you do have to get pretty darn close to naked, you’re going to feel a little silly, and it’s going to be cold. But it doesn’t have to be totally unpleasant. This past weekend I was feeling especially Casper the Ghost-like so I talked to Kerry up at The Tan Man and booked a spray tan appointment.
This wasn’t my first spray tan, but most of my spray tan experience comes from fitness competitions, and the goal there really isn’t the natural look. The goal is to make you look like a totally different ethnicity. So I told Cailin (my spray tan technician), I wanted a natural light bronze and that I trusted her professional eye. Because I can’t help myself, I made small talk while I was standing there in my undies. (Truth be told, I probably would have gone bare ass but they told me to wear undies. How Puritan!) If you’re worried about standing around for 15 minutes in your thong, Cailin tells me that some people are shy and cover up more (lame) and that if you’re worried she’s judging you, get over yourself! She does this all the time and between this and nursing school she’s seen it all – so don’t be shy. And honestly, you would probably look dumber standing there in your petticoat or whatever prudes wear for underclothes.
So it takes about 15 minutes to get sprayed. Then 5 minutes or so to dry off and voila, you’re done! I thought you were J-Lo for a minute there. Ha ha, just kidding, you wish you looked like J Lo. But you know who don’t look like? J-Wow (unless you asked to look like J-Wow, and if that’s the case, God love ya). I gave my spray tan the ultimate test – my mom. Between you and me, she would love nothing better to tell me I looked like Sookie (she would mean Snooki of course, but she confuses the two) and she didn’t. World’s toughest critic told me my tan looked natural, which is like gushing for her.
Now pay attention, because here is the important part of the blog (no, me in my skivvies was not the important part). The first day you get a spray tan, it’s a couple shades darker than when the color actually sets, so if you’re getting your spray tan for a specific event, don’t get it the same day. Also, the day of the spray tan, shower but don’t use any lotion, cream, or deodorant, There can’t be anything on your skin or you risk an uneven tan and looking like a dope. You can get your kick ass spray tan at The Tan Man (49 L St. ) and if you have anyone on your Christmas list that’s pale enough to be mistaken for a Cullen (Twilight reference cuz I’m so young and hip), get them a gift certificate!
Merry Christmas and just because it’s winter it doesn’t mean you have to be as pale as Frosty!